Is It Time To Get Rid Of Fraternities?

Filed in National by on March 27, 2015

I will admit I have a strong bias against fraternities. During college I witnessed them in action, and what I see today is no different from what I saw then. I am not saying that all members are all awful, but the mob mentality surrounding them is disturbing.  I don’t see a strong sense of leadership or individuality in fraternities (or sororities). Everyone seems to just follow the loudest voice, and if that voice is singing a racist song… everyone just sings along.

TPM puts together quite a list of bad frat behavior. Actually, it isn’t “bad” it’s appalling and shocking. Here’s a recap of incidents from just this month:

1. SAE’s racist song/chant

This month’s boomlet of fraternity news began on March 8, when a video that allegedly showed members of a University of Oklahoma fraternity singing a racist chant on a bus ride went viral.

“There will never be a nigger in SAE,” the frat members sang. “There will never be a nigger in SAE. You can hang them from a tree, but they’ll never sign with me. There will never be a nigger in SAE.”

Even more shocking than this vile chant is the way it was excused by many. The Morning Joe crew even blamed this behavior on rap music – claiming that these frat guys learned these words, thoughts, ideas from rap. Never mind that the song/chant they sang wasn’t rap, that it obviously was home grown at SAE, all that mattered was that these boys were somehow not responsible for the words that left their mouths. But not being responsible is as common to frats as secret handshakes.

Add to that how the discussion morphed into how these boys weren’t racist. Exactly what do you have to do today to be considered racist? Actually lynch a black person rather than just singing about lynching a black person?

2. Kappa Delta Rho posts photos of nude, unconscious women on FB page

Students at Pennsylvania State University were up in arms against a fraternity accused of sharing photos of nude, unconscious women on Facebook.

[…]

Police have since determined that at least two of the photos could lead to criminal charges, and some of the women pictured in the photos have come forward.

[…]

The anonymous (member of Kappa Delta Rho) student and self-proclaimed “good guy” insisted that the fraternity members didn’t share the photos maliciously. He also argued that the only person who should be punished for the group’s behavior is whoever “snitched.”

“It’s just satire. … Nobody’s sitting there like, ‘Oh … how are we going to victimize these people?’” he said in defense of his fraternity.

Someone doesn’t understand the meaning of the word satire. Also notice where he feels the blame deserves to fall – on the snitch. That mindset is disturbing. What’s even more disturbing is I doubt he’s the only person to feel this way.

3. Pi Kappa Phi – The Notebook

“It will be short and painful, just like when I rape you.”

“That tree is so perfect for lynching.”

Those were just a couple of the jarring comments members of North Carolina State University’s Pi Kappa Phi fraternity wrote in a so-called “pledge book” discovered last week.

Local TV station WRAL, which first obtained the notebook, posted photos of some of its pages that blurred out offensive language. The following statements were legible, however:

“Dude if she’s hot enough, she doesn’t need a pulse.”

“Be kind to the whales for they’ll lead you to the dolphins.”

“The only reason I don’t hook up with fat chicks is I’m afraid I’ll love it.”

“I like little girls.”

This is the stuff of horror movies. Lynching, rape, necrophilia, pedophilia? Anyone would be forgiven for thinking these were the comments of a serial killer – and if they were a serial killer’s words everyone would say, “That makes sense. This guy’s dangerous and obviously mentally imbalanced – Evil”.

None of this falls under the heading of humor. Imagine having someone say things like this at your next dinner party. (Sure, some people will find the fat jokes funny – whatever, not the point) Now imagine any of the other comments being tossed across the table.

So what causes things like this to be written down, posted to Facebook, sang when everyone knows this wouldn’t happen in mixed company? I tend to blame the insular environment of frats. On some level, these fraternities are okay with this behavior. On some level I even think it’s expected. I also don’t think today’s behavior is anything new. We just hear about it today due to technology.

4. Kappa Sigma “F*%k Consent email

Here’s the full text of the email, as quoted by the Huffington Post:

Regardless of the rush shirt let’s get rachet as f*** during rush week. My d**k will be sucked and f***ed in compound basement whether you guys like it or not. Don’t invite any n****r gals or curry monsters or slanted eye chinks, unless they’re hot. Ziggy you’re [sic] girl can come she’s cool. Remember my n***as, erect, assert, and insert, and above all else, f*** consent … d**ks untouched.

Yes, this is one email sent by one person, but the fact that he felt comfortable enough to send this email under his real name speaks volumes. It helps that someone who received and read this email reported it. That gives me hope. But I have to ask myself, like I did with the above example, why are these guys so comfortable with saying these things? To me that implies acceptance of what’s being said and done. And that’s the problem in a nutshell.

5. Alpha Delta Phi – Branding

Dartmouth confirmed this week that it extended the suspension handed down to the fraternity last fall for holding unregistered parties over fresh allegations that the organization branded its new members like livestock.

Branding? Is it any wonder that someone who would agree to be branded (and other hazing rituals) wouldn’t be considered an independent thinker? And as awful as all the other examples above are (and they are stomach turning awful) the branding incident gives us a clear view inside the fraternity mindset. There aren’t many taboos left once you let someone brand you.

So, what do you guys think? Is it time to get rid of fraternities? Do they need more oversight? Regulations? Is there a fix for this behavior? My daughter leaves for college this fall. My husband (who belonged to a frat, btw) told her, in no uncertain terms, to stay away from fraternities.

*And yes, I know there are wonderful individuals associated with frats (Hello? I married one.), but we’re not discussing individuals. We’re discussing an organization – an organization that’s pretty “adept at ducking liability for what happens under their roofs.”

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A stay-at-home mom with an obsession for National politics.

Comments (14)

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  1. I never understood why frats and sororities should be part of college life. Just excuses to self-select, exclude, and get drunk.

  2. ben says:

    I think Universities should require organizations to serve something other than a “social purpose”
    I am an alumnus member of Phi Mu Alpha Symphonia. This is a musical fraternity that provides support to studying musicians, and performs at nursing homes/ half way homes, etc. The nature of such a group attracts a much more diverse set of men (yes, it is still all men, sadly) than your straight, white, alpha male frat-boy stereoscope.
    anyway, my point is not to talk up my college group…. Fraternities and Sororities get certain benefits on campus… especially if they are a part of the Greek society, or whatever that is (FMA was not) These benefits, and the right to operate on campus should be contingent, every single semester, on doing work for the community and meeting behavioral expectations. Does you frat host parties every weekend and leave beer cans all over South Chapel? SEE YA! Did your group run a charity event and raise money for something worth raising money for? good for you, keep on truckin’.
    There is a very ingrained idea of why one would join a social frat. Comradery and fellowship are just superficial words to mean “it’ll help me get laid better”.

  3. gigi says:

    The Phi Kappa Tau frat at my college used to do a Nairobi Night during this spring party week where they all wore black face. Ugh. I tried to explain how friggin terrible and racist it was but no one would listen. Unless you were a frat member or little/big sister, entry was prohibited so I am not sure how many people outside of it were aware. This was before the age of camera phones. I wonder if they still do it…

  4. pandora says:

    Ugh is right, Gigi. This is why diversity matters in real life. No one in that room saw the slightest thing wrong with planning and hosting a Nairobi Night. Of course they didn’t listen to you. What you were saying went against the fraternity group-think and what they were taught at home. Talk about a bubble.

    And there’s zero chance of anyone convincing me the vast majority of these kids don’t learn this stuff at home. They do. Sure, their parents may not use blatant racial and sexist slurs, but I’d lay money their message comes through loud and clear. These kids just haven’t learned how to censor (hide) their hate speech like their parents. These kids are their parents’ id.

  5. mouse says:

    Put them on double secret probation

  6. mouse says:

    Anecdotally, I’ve noticed several friends from frats who have hand signs for blacks and Jews..

  7. Dorian Gray says:

    Although I am sincerely embarrassed to say so, I must admit I was in a fraternity at university. I lived in the house and everything. I don’t recall anything as overt as some of the examples mentioned. We did have a few Jewish guys and one black guy. I know it sounds ridiculous, but relative to most fraternities I guess we were downright progressive! The 20 year-old me really enjoyed it, but frankly it’s not difficult to satisfy a young man of 20 years.

    Joking aside, upon reflection the milieu was very clear. The nastiness was there. The misogyny was there. The alcohol and drug use/abuse was there. I was a so-called late-bloomer anyhow and the fraternity experience certainly retarded my social and cultural development. The irony is I joined to come out of my shell. I saw it as an opportunity to do that. Then I just got caught up in the mob mentality and fell right in line with the others. I still have a little shame about this if I’m honest.

    I have no issue with a full-scale elimination of social fraternities. It was just a university sanctioned social club with very lax oversight. Even when stricter rules were in place and enforced it really had much very little impact.

  8. gigi says:

    I feel ya Dorian. I was a Phi Tau little sister. My friends were generally good people, but completely out of touch on some stuff. The alumni are who really creeped me out as they were way older, usually married and would come to Homecoming or parties and prey on young extremely drunk girls. Never drink anything mixed in a cooler, always watch your beverage and don’t accept a pre-opened drink unless from a bartender. There are horrible people out there.

  9. Dave says:

    I went to a Catholic college operated by Christian Brothers under Lasallian Principles. We do not have fraternities or sororities. The school did not just have principles, they lived them. The kind of activities that fraternities and sororities engage in would not have been tolerated.

    However, it was a smaller school (2,900) and I can imagine how intimidating it would be to attend a school with ten times that number. Fraternities and sororities serve a useful purpose in creating a sense of belonging that is simply not possible with very large student bodies, but not without values, principles, and supervision.

  10. donviti says:

    ” don’t see a strong sense of leadership or individuality in fraternities (or sororities). Everyone seems to just follow the loudest voice, and if that voice is singing a racist song… everyone just sings along.”

    And without a fraternity…it’ll all disappear…magically. Whacka mole idea if there ever was one. Something else will come along and replace it. Instead of thinking eliminating is the right thing to do, perhaps a little more oversight is needed. Not the bullshit mantra of they are just kids finding their way.

    But then, if colleges really cared about the kids and their education the NCAA as a hole wouldn’t really be able to profit from it, nor would the alcohol industry, or sports, or media, or fill in the blank

  11. pandora says:

    And the idea that the racist chant was an isolated OU problem…

    Members of the University of Oklahoma’s Sigma Alpha Epsilon fraternity learned the racist chant that got it kicked off campus at a leadership event sponsored by the national fraternity, President David Boren said Friday.

    Boren said in a news conference that the the school’s investigation into the local SAE chapter found frat members learned the chant four years ago during a leadership cruise sponsored by the fraternity’s national organization. Local chapter members who attended that event then brought the chant back to OU, where they incorporated it into their pledging process, Boren said.

    You’ve got to be carefully taught.

    I also think the element of strict secrecy surrounding fraternities enables this behavior.

    Perhaps the answer is to sever the direct connection between fraternities and sororities from colleges/university.

  12. puck says:

    Ban ’em. Fraternities would be much cooler as underground secret societies.

  13. Dan says:

    The behavior here is abhorrent. But isn’t the real problem here colleges? The emphasis on fraternities is misplaced; it’s really colleges we ought to be abolishing. We should look at that OU song (or any of these other incidents) and say, “look what college students do” not “look what fraternity members do.” Every single deplorable act committed by a fraternity member is also, necessarily, committed by a college student, and if we’re going to place blame on the group for the acts of the individuals, it’s college students generally, and not fraternity members generally, we should be focusing on.

  14. Another Mike says:

    Like Dave, my small Catholic university did not then and does not now have fraternities or sororities. Everybody knew everyone anyway, so they weren’t needed. There were plenty of opportunities to make friends.

    Banning them will not end stupid behavior, as donviti said. Youth+alcohol+free time will nearly always = something unfortunate or despicable happening, with or without fraternities.