Not Sure What To Make Of This
Yesterday, my 13 year old daughter told me she had deleted her Facebook account. When I asked her why, she said… It was taking up too much of her time and, while she’d miss it, Facebook was pretty lame.
Needless to say, I was surprised. I check her FaceBook account several times a week – to make sure there’s no cyber-bullying, inappropriate conversations, etc. – and there was never anything out of the ordinary. I guess I’m wondering if this is just my kid or if anyone else is experiencing this phenomenon.
Tags: Facebook, technology
I’m going to help you here. Your child has deleted her facebook account. Your child has made a new facebook account that you dont know about. Your child has fooled you.
Now that your child is a teenager, perhaps it’s time to start to back off a little bit?
Only one problem with that theory, Phil. She didn’t need to delete the original account. If she was trying to “fool” me she’d be running two accounts – the one I knew about and the one I didn’t.
She just arrived home from school and told me three more of her friends were deleting their FB accounts. Is the FB craze fading?
I suspect when she realizes how much harder it is to make plans, stay in the loop, be aware of what’s going on at school etc. when everyone else is on fb and she’s not, she’ll probably come back to it in at least a limited way. I have a few friends “off the grid” and they’re not necessarily hard to get a hold of, but I do sometimes forget to invite them to things by accident.
I wouldn’t go as far as Phil (nor would I in any way question your parenting style since I know neither your or your child) but I will say as one of the youngish people here that some of my friends who had parents that heavily monitored them grew to resent it, feeling there was a lack of trust in their decisions/choices. My own mother when I was a teenager promised that she’d never go through my things as long as I was honest with her. My grandmother did it to her and she felt like she “never had anything that was just hers.” It was that one thing that her folks did to her and she didnt’ want to do to us. Not at all a criticism, just a separate point of view.
I got on at the ground floor when it was still just college, maybe now that your grandma is on fb it’s not as fun anymore for 13 yr olds? I remember being kind of grossed out when they opened it up to everyone.
I say good for her. While I do have a Facebook and use it all the time, I do so because i pretty much have to. I hate how I find out about what my friends (real not FB term) are doing through what is basically a public press release. I found out my best friend of 10 years was engaged via Facebook before I heard it from him personally.
Hopefully this a trend that will take us back to personal interection.
omg! gtg. Gottta check my FB than go for a GTL. TTYL!
Pandora,
I guess, like ‘Palin-fatigue,’ there is now FaceBook-Fatigue! 😉
My 11-year-old daughter created a ‘second’ account last month, but we made her delete it.
Your daughter might be a counter cultural type person, which means she doesn’t need the approval of the status quo to have strong sense of personal identity. If so, that’s a good thing and you are very fortunate.
My thirteen year old deleted hers as well. My son deleted his (a couple of times) when he was sixteen, but has a page now that he only updates infrequently. I have never had one.
My bride maintains one for her employer. Maybbe interest is fading. A couple of the 20 somethings I work with admit to not maintaining a page.
Reminds me of a bit I heard a comedian do awhile back (can’t remember who).
Johnny: “I just reached my 10,000 friend on facebook!”
Tommy: “What are you donig tonight, Johnny?”
Johnny: “Staying home on facebook.”
Hmmm… this is looking like a trend.
Meatball, did your 13 year old give a reason for deleting? I’m interested!
Mine is about the same age as yours, has no FB account and has no desire to have one. and we are pleased about it.
maybe your daughter is a secure, mature child who feels it unecessary to open up her life to everyone and become a target for the more immature kids out there
I say, good for her!!! I hope mine never gets one either. Altho’ she is trending to not engage with social media – we cannot get her to even use her cell phone either – she just doesn’t care about that stuff and peer approval is way down on her list.
Sounds like phil had parenting issues that he would like to ghost onto your child……..
Remember hula-hoops?
Also.
I would have deactivating my FB account long ago if I didn’t use it to advertise my blog, even though FB has brought some nice things in my life (one of which is snoozing down the hall there).
If you are considering leaving Facebook, know that everything you have uploaded must be deleted first. FB is sort of like the Hotel California of the tubes. You can check out, but it tries to keep all your luggage.
I am with Socialistic Ben, Your daughter is showing good sense. I have to wade thru too much crap on Facebook before I find anything I truly value. If she has some good friends at her age then she is blessed.
This post makes me think of the Munster’s misfit daughter Marilyn 🙂
Also, does anybody remember the day they cancelled their AOL account? Same thing – like AOL, Facebook is just another outfit trying to wall you off from the real Internet.
I’m thinking about starting another Facebook account, just for a smaller group of people. I’ve gotten where I sort of dread looking at FB because of all teh crazy on it.
I’m shocked when someone gives me a work related email address and it is “@aol.com” It is like seeing a Woolly Mammoth.
If I ever find myself creating A, B, and C lists of my friends it is time to re-evaluate something. Not sure what though.
Pandora,
“Just boring” that is all. She is still a rabid texter and talker, though.
Wow! Same here, Meatball!
And Ben… hearing about your best friend’s engagement via FB is one of the saddest things I’ve ever heard! 😥
FB = Endless Family Christmas letters.
parents, lol
Hmmm… my daughter has read the comments, and she has asked me if she can respond. I have granted her permission. Everyone should probably buckle up!
oh man, we are all about to get schooled by a teenager. Well, i stand ready with a bunch of venom to defend her if the trolls come a trollin’.
And thanks Pan… i did actually get a call the same day it was posted, Im just a big believer in keeping those close to you in a tighter loop than the FB world. (i also have a fun little revenge planned for the bachelor party)
I love you, Ben!
Right now she is at her TSA club (Technology Student Association). She’ll weigh in shortly.
Of course I told her that if she entered this forum she needed to be respectful. I will demand (and enforce) the same from other commenters.
Personally, I am thrilled with the relationship I have with my children. I am also fully aware that that may change any day – and that would be normal. Despite Phil’s mockery… my children are comfortable speaking with me (again, for now) but that probably has more to do with me not freaking out about sex, drugs and rock n roll. 😉
Dear Mr. Phil,
Thank you for making assumptions about me, but they truly aren’t necessary. I have done something that I believe will help me not only manage my time more wisely, but also stay out of the teenage drama as much as humanly possible. I know that it may be hard to believe, but not all teenagers are going behind their parents’ backs.
Also, I am unbelievably comfortable talking to my mom. I tell her everything, and there wouldn’t be a point in hiding such a minimal fact of another facebook account from her.
So, once again, thank you. I appreciate your consideration but I, shockingly, am not double-crossing my mom.
Sincerely,
Pandora Jr. 🙂
You go, Girl!
I already told your mom this, but it is a real pleasure to know a young person who is wise enough to NOT be hell-bent to be part of the herd.
Remember your friends when you take over the World, ok?
And the SMACKDOWN was delivered by::::::::
PANDORA JR!!!! YEAH
YOU ROCK GIRL!!
Pandora Jr. FTW!
oohh… you are good. The way you were polite and self-righteous at the same time. You made sure to hit the buzz words that would stroke your mom’s ego, because you know all she really craves is to hear that she’s been a great parent. well played, and enjoy your newly won freedom.
I’m going to let your comment stay, Phil, because I can’t think of a better way to show the world a typical tea bagger in action.
Just for fun… everyone should compare the use of vocabulary between the 13 year old girl and the adult male tea bagger.
lol, drama was also a word tossed about by my favorite daughter.
Drama is obviously a big deal on FB, meatball. My daughter always accompanies the word with an impressive eye roll.
I have noticed that people with lots of FB ‘friends’ rarely post anymore and seem to avoid using the site. I suspect the lack of use is because the number of posts by ‘friends’ makes the site less appealing. babble overload syndrome paricularly from teen posters