The Post I’d Write Right Now If I Wasn’t the Lazy Son of a Bitch That I am

Filed in National by on November 13, 2010

I’m bored with how fucked up Republicans are. So if I was going to write a post right now, I’d write about how I sense that America’s stupid, narrow, dumbed-down, cultural beauty standards for women are changing for the better.

Except I’m a lazy son of a bitch and it is a very nice day out..so, here is a picture of Zooey Deschanel.

About the Author ()

Jason330 is a deep cover double agent working for the GOP. Don't tell anybody.

Comments (23)

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  1. delacrat says:

    Hmmm, I never thought of hazel eyes as a solution to fucked-up Republicans.

  2. anonone says:

    She looks stoned.

  3. OpenMinded says:

    Her sister is “Bones”. Can you post a picture of her as well?

  4. Free Radical says:

    “I definitely would NOT hit it. Just look at the bags under her eyes. She is way below my standards.”

    Source: Fark cliche: http://farm1.static.flickr.com/88/213423984_a82afcda90.jpg

  5. anon says:

    Isn’t this an old donviti post?

  6. jason330 says:

    America’s stupid, narrow, dumbed-down, cultural beauty standards for women didn’t seem to bother him much.

  7. Al Pearis says:

    @Free Radical. You wouldn’t hit that?! You’re crazy.

  8. donviti says:

    Just think, I was criticized for an Earbuds in my nose post by you

  9. anon says:

    When you are a younger guy you just look at the 18-25 year old girls. But when you get older you start looking at women in their 30s and 40s and thinking, “Damn, she’s pretty good looking too.” So the universe of good looking women keeps expanding as you get older. It is God’s way of compensating men for… whatever we lose as we get older.

    That is why guys turn around and look at girls in public. We are not indulging in lust, or wishing we were with her instead – we are trying to fit her into our definition of what is hot. We are recalibrating and expanding our world view, and shifting our Overton window of hotness.

    So girls, if you are out with your guy and you catch his eye following another woman, don’t be offended – this is what allows us to keep on thinking you are still hot as you both get older. And we really do.

    Odd how the standards of female beauty are set by gay men though.

  10. Free Radical says:

    Al Pearis: Guess you missed the quotation marks, hyperlink, and joke 😀

  11. Miscreant says:

    “… We are recalibrating and expanding our world view, and shifting our Overton window of hotness.”

    With your permission, I’d like to use that line of exquisite bullshit on my wife, the next time she busts me for eyeballing a younger babe.

    Thanks in advance.

  12. anon40 says:

    Zooey is cute. Her big sister Emily falls into the same class as Nancy Glass (yes, I’m dating myself, but Glass is a perfect example)–one of those girls who is almost attractive, but just short of the mark.

    Emily isn’t ugly (nor is/was Glass), but there’s just something about her that doesn’t work for me.

  13. fightingbluehen says:

    Nothing wrong with that girl at all. She’s smokin. At least she doesn’t look like one of those plucked chicken ultra skinny girls.

  14. Dana says:

    anon wrote:

    When you are a younger guy you just look at the 18-25 year old girls. But when you get older you start looking at women in their 30s and 40s and thinking, “Damn, she’s pretty good looking too.” So the universe of good looking women keeps expanding as you get older.

    You know that you’re getting older when you’re helping your daughter move into her apartment at college, see a bunch of cute co-eds, and think, “Darn, I’ll bet their mothers look good!” 🙂

  15. gigisan says:

    She is fantastic in “Elf” which is my favorite xmas movie. Surprising as Trillian in “The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy”, but I’m a geek. Definitly hot because she reminds me of my own bride’s querky, intelligent take on life (at least as Ms. Deschanel portrays it, my wife is the real deal).

  16. skippertee says:

    Yes, this lass is lovely.
    Were she to lock eyes with you in real life, as in this pic, one would be shot and struck dumb and a willing wanderer as she meanders.

  17. anon says:

    She looks like Xena, Warrior Princess.

  18. Al Pearis says:

    @Free Radical. Whew, thanks for clearing that up. You had me worried Bro. LOL.

  19. fightingbluehen says:

    I google imaged her and the pic above probably makes her look a little better than she actually looks, especially now that I’m sober. Looks similar to Katy Perry in other photos, which ain’t too bad anyways.

  20. Jason330 says:

    If missing the point as an Olympic sport, you guys would be the East German womens track team circa 1980.

  21. fightingbluehen says:

    I get your drift Jason. The trend definitely seems to be waning from the surgically altered perception of beauty to the more natural form.

  22. donviti says:

    “If missing the point as an Olympic sport, you guys would be the East German womens track team circa 1980.”

    Here here Jason! It really sucks when people don’t get your posts….

  23. anon says:

    you guys would be the East German womens track team circa 1980.

    Please do not post any pictures.