QOTE
Is using the word “retard” in a derogatory sense as bad as saying “nigger”?
If so, when did this happen?
Of all the fines levied against him, how much will Donald Trump actually pay?
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Yes it is! I have a sibling who is developmentally disabled. Back when we were kids, bullies would call her and other special ed kids “retard,” as an insult. We’re talking 40+ years ago. It was hurtful and ugly then and it is hurtful and ugly now.
Yes, “retard” is considered quite insulting but I’m not sure if it’s to the same level as the n-word.
Yes it is. The only reason you feel more free to say “retard” is because you know he won’t pop a cap in your ass.
Howard Stern used “retard” freely and as far as I know, is responsible for the current popularization of it. If you spent many years listening to Howard Stern you would have missed the changeover.
Let’s make it 4 for 4. It is as bad as the N word to families that love a child with a diagnosis.
Incidentally, how many responses will it take for you to apologize to Mark?
not many more
Donviti, I am hitting you up for ten tickets to the Blue-Gold game next year.
It is. Mango up.
I cringe when I hear it. A cashier used that word to a co-worker off the cuff talking to a passing co-worker, and I still don’t think she “got it”. when I questioned her. But heaven forbid if I called her white trash.
Pre-pubescent boys have it tough these days — they can’t call their friends gay or retard. Sad times, sad times.
man
Check out the new blog site…I’ll have a lot of fun with this
DUDE!!!
that is so fucking awesome. I’m not even kidding! There isn’t another writer on this blog that has an anti website in their effogy!
I’m the shit!
dude, you should link to a coupon site on there to make some real $$$
Jason used to have an anti-Jason. good times… good times.
http://antijason.wordpress.com/
Are people of European heritage offended when they’re called white? We studied the origin of the word “nigger” in college…could you imagine that now?
STFU whitey!
As the father of an autistic son as well, I will weigh in, both words are the quintessence of derogatory to the group each word impugns.
http://www.r-word.org/
Good link John. How old is your son?
8, will be 9 later this year.
Changing subjects, can we get a poll for El Sommnabulo vs. JMY for the special Music for the Masses (MFTM)?
🙂
I thought I may know him, but I do not. I’ve been out of the game too long…
My wife would most likely have already had this handled by now.
Well, I learn something every god damned day.
I’m sorry, especially since now that I know I offended someone and now that I know I offended JY too. god damnit! It doesn’t even matter if I’m sorry or not. Here is a person that quit her post and is using the effogy of her daughter to score political points. If it isn’t bad enough to use an infant to make a point, it is also a handicapped infant.
So I took a cheap shot and in my infinite ignorance I said something I shouldn’t have an offended people I had no idea I was offending.
I’m sorry I did both
I know I’m ass as I have already said. I like to think however I understand this shortcoming, and because of it, am willing to listen and change.
Again, my apoligies
I accept your apology on behalf of my son, who I believe hopes to find a tolerant world to self-actualize into.
Your wife wrote that for you, didn’t she? 🙂
now……….can I get that poll? I think I am kicking El’s ass……
If I am supposed to do it, you will have to wait until the AM. G’night.
DV, I think your plea of ignorance was especially convincing.
While I disagree with the prevailing opinion that people ought to be forbidden to use the expression “retard” to describe the words, attitudes and behaviors of certain right-wingers on here and in the nation, I have no taste for my words causing Don V. et al on here to catch heat from people who don’t understand (or are incapable of understanding) the concepts of hyperbole and exaggeration.
And so, for the likes of people such as Mike Protack, Lou Dobbs, Sean Hannity, Rush Limbaugh, and Glenn Beck, I will concoct and devise other words to use on here to convey the level of hatred and scorn they so richly deserve.
And if any thought-police want to come down on someone for using the word “retard” to describe people like the deranged birther who fouled up Mike Castle’s town hall, well, then, you come down on ME. I’m a big boy and I can take it. Doesn’t bother me in the least what you think of me. Just leave Don V. and anyone ELSE administrating this blog the hell alone.
Here’s the word from my teenager, a high functioning developmentally delayed kiddo finishing high school this year in a special school:
“Calling a kid with any disablity a retard or retarded is like calling him a nigger. He knows he’s got issues, and you just made them more important than who he is and worse than anything else … just like using the N word.
Calling what a kid does retarded is different. Maybe it was retarded! hey, it happens!”
Rich,
It’s not really about coming down on the person, it’s the word. You’re right, this is America, use it all you want. Just know that when you do, it speaks to you far more than to those you disparage with it. Me saying it offends me is a personal opinion. I like to think it is an informed opinion, but it is personal nevertheless. I understand from your message that you do not care what I think, and that is OK too. Therefore, please stand by your convictions so eloquently expressed above and do not reply to this as your position is crystal clear.
Peace.
once again I have learned something. I honestly had no idea.
This was actually in interesting thread.
I told Rich before about using that word. and you guys were silent.
Like DV, I’ve never thought of the R word in the same class as the N word and, although I’ve never used it much, I’m glad ya’ll pointed out how mean and cruel it is. I’ll never use it again.
However, I sympathize with Rick’s point, somethings need a descriptor and the R word does define something as stupid. I’d propose a new word. It can serve the same way the F word does, as a noun, verb, adverb, whatever. The word is bush. Like “you’re bushing me over.” Or “that is so bushy”. Bush could substitute for lame, stupid, corrupt, incompetent, etc. I look forward to seeing it in some future thesaurus.
Oh well, it’s Sunday morning.
..er except for the connotation bush holds for a certain lady part…
🙂
That’s not true Joanne. I know lg has said this before as well. There still seems to be some disagreement on whether you can use the word “retarded” to describe that actions of adults. I won’t use it, it’s not a word that I’ve used since I was a kid, but I know it’s considered extremely offensive. I think DV’s use in the context he used it was more offensive because he was talking about a child with Down’s Syndrome. I think words like “idiotic” or “dumb” describe the behavior as much as anything else.
JC may well be right. There are many times when I will keep reading and move on without comment. Just like I might have with a octogenarian that uses a slur. I certainly don’t like the word and avoid it, but what irked me is the attack on someone that took offense.
If an old person uses the N word and an African-American gets pissed off, I expect the old person to apologize and note it in their brain as well as they can.
If said old person starts screaming that the African-American is a lousy, no-good, stupid N word in response, I am going to change my tack. I think DV has manned up here and taken responsibility. Of course, Mark has yet to accept the apology. I think I have made my point.
No, LG he hasn’t. My biggest gripe was the other stuff that came out of his keyboard when I called him on using the word. I didn’t get all personal on him and he’s ranting and raving and bringing up personal stuff just because I disagreed with him.
Mark – thus, my sentence:
I certainly don’t like the word and avoid it, but what irked me is the attack on someone that took offense.
You are that someone.
And I don’t think you need to feel like he has adequately addressed it if you don’t think he has sufficiently obliged.
lol.
And please add “spaz” to the taboo list. Another one that yanks my chain.
It’s OK, Joanne. None of us young folk use that word anyway. Too 1975… 🙂
Well believe me LG, no one from ’75 would have the inconsideration to use “retard”–we listened to our mothers!!! Raise your generation better!!!!
And by the way Cass–we are finishing up the Sunday BLTs right now…..
As the mother of a severely disabled son, I and my children recall the horror of just taking my son to a park. The other mothers would grab their kids and run, you would have thought the whole family had leprosy or something. My other children couldnt understand why the other kids wouldnt play with them, cuz they had a kid brother who was obviously disabled. Do you really expect people with disabilities to call you out when you call them that ugly name? Teach your children that calling another person a retard or a spaz is just like calling someone the awful n word. My adult children still talk about these episodes to this day. It hurts, its sad, and totally unnecessary.
I plan on teaching them right now. I even call my dog a retard occasionally in front of my kids.
After this discussion I plan on having this discussion with my kids. I honestly had no idea they were equally as hurtful/hateful.
enlightening.
Using the word as a noun is usually done with the intent to insult. Such use is offensive. Mentally retarded is politically incorrect but is often used by groups who provide services to those suffering from limited mental capacity.
Joanne Christian said, “I told Rich before about using that word. and you guys were silent.”
You “TOLD” me before, Joanne? Who do you think you are? Listen, Joanne, no offense to you, but *I don’t answer to you*. In fact, no one here does. You don’t get to boss people around. Well, maybe at your job you do, but – and let’s be crystal clear about this – you don’t get to boss people around on here. I’ll use this word where and when I please. The reason the staff on here were “silent” is because they appreciate the concept of freedom of speech.
And one more thing: if you honestly don’t think that this word applies to the words, actions and behaviors of the neo-cons, right-wingers, wingnuts, birthers, and racists in this country, I would suggest to you that you need to take a good, hard look inside yourself and ask yourself if you really understand politics (or people) at all.
Rich – have you lost it? Seriously.
Joanne is saying that she told someone before that that word is offensive. It is.
I get it, you like the word and don’t want to pull words out of your dictionary. Fine. Make sure you keep calling people niggers, also. You could say dumb stuff like there are white people that are niggers also.
Or keep using Jew as a verb as in “He tried to jew me out of the check.” That’ll show ’em that they don’t control your vocabulary.
I am not going to ban your use of the word retard on Delaware Liberal, but – and let me be crystal clear about this – we will think less of you for it. Now I suggest you take a hard look at what you wrote above and ask yourself if you would be so outspoken about someone getting pissed off about your use of the word nigger.
Liberalgeek,
Sigh. Sorry, but the n-word and the “r-word” aren’t even *close* in impact; seriously – a little history would be applicable here.
“Joanne is saying that she told someone before that that word is offensive. It is.”
Um, NO. Wrong. Joanne’s tone (an the accompanying implication) was perfectly clear in her post: she believes that she gets to tell people what to say and what not to say.
“I get it, you like the word and don’t want to pull words out of your dictionary. Fine. Make sure you keep calling people niggers, also. You could say dumb stuff like there are white people that are niggers also.”
Make sure I “keep calling people niggers”? Seriously, liberalgeek, this statement makes ME wonder if it’s YOU who has lost it. I don’t call people “niggers” – never have, never will. Why, you ask? Oh, that’s easy to answer: because that would be a racist thing to do. Apples and oranges, however. Totally not even on the same level as the “r-word”. No disrespect, but I think something has clouded your judgment, it seems to me, if you can so callously accuse me of using such a racist word.
“Or keep using Jew as a verb as in “He tried to jew me out of the check.” That’ll show ‘em that they don’t control your vocabulary.”
Honest to God, liberalgeek, what is wrong with you?! Again with the phrasing “keep using”, as though it were a “fact” that I use that expression. And let me tell you something right now: I hate anti-Semitism, anti-Semites, and neo-nazi’s. You do NOT want to get into this game with me. My grandfather did not serve in WW2 to protect the world from Hitler and the Nazi’s just so you could come along and callously accuse others (without basis) of being anti-Semites. I got so angry when I read this response it was hard to keep my pulse in line. God damn it, Liberalgeek!!! How DARE you imply that I would use an expression like “he tried to jew me out of the check”!
I don’t care that you “think less” of me; I know exactly who I am: anti-racist, and against those who use anti-Semitic expressions. On top of this, if you had fully read my reply earlier on this thread about the word, I already *SAID* I would opt for other words because I don’t want any idiot attacking him (or you, for this matter, sigh) just because I elect to use a given word.
anti-Semitic, anti-racist, pro r-word.
Make sure to include that on your CV.
The point is that the word is offensive, along the lines of the N word, to people who work with or love mentally handicapped people. Just like attacking someone with the N word because they are of a skin color they were born with. Using the R word to describe someone with a diminished mental capacity (or a political opponent) that they were born with or acquired is the same.
And if you say, I’ll use any goddamn word I want to use to describe someone, then you are doing the same thing as someone who does continue to use the offensive words (and application of words) I gave above. The anger that you felt when you read my suggestion that you use those words is exactly the feeling that people have when you use the word retard to describe someone.
I don’t actually think you are racist, anti-semitic or anti-handicapped. If you call people “retards” you are in the same company as racists, anti-semites and the anti-handicapped.
Comment from Rich: “Liberalgeek,
Sigh. Sorry, but the n-word and the “r-word” aren’t even *close* in impact; seriously – a little history would be applicable here. ”
I agree. History shows that a group of people, based on one characteristic, were herded into groups, not allowed to marry, not allowed to travel, kept in confined,indoor spaces,without access to the out-of-doors. They were not allowed to vote, drive, travel or have free speech. They had limited access to education, if at all; they had limited access to medical care, since it was assumed that they would die at an early age regardless of medical intervention. They were often physically mistreated in the facilities into which they were herded … and Heraldo Rivera made his career on the back of this mistreatment. Their families, when interested, were told it was “best” if they were forgotten and families often pretended they were dead.
UNTIL AROUND 1960!
That would be the severely developmentally disabled.
A little history of “retarded” would be a good idea.
It’s nice that Rich and other won’t use the “n” word. I guess they have found another group to verbally spit upon.
(Thanks, LG, for this: The point is that the word is offensive, along the lines of the N word, to people who work with or love mentally handicapped people. Just like attacking someone with the N word because they are of a skin color they were born with. Using the R word to describe someone with a diminished mental capacity (or a political opponent) that they were born with or acquired is the same.)
Why is it so difficult for people to give those who are different from them some human respect?
I love progressive mom.
And thank you Geek for being so gallant.
But I’ll take it from here in my uneducated, provincial, politically ignorant, socially inept way of tending to someone who I suppose has “called me out”……
Mr. Boucher,
Long before there was PC, many of us common folks subscribed to an internal code of common decency, core humanity, and verbal discretion.
We had to learn as we go..some of us. My father reflects about how the very worst thing you could call a fellow male growing up was a “sissy”. We couldn’t believe it, and laughed around the dinner table at that one, when we were kids. For me–it was first grade–the early 60’s, and Mom made it clear at dinner again, that we will no longer be referring to “the colored”. She asked “what color are they?”, to finish our questions off…and then proceeded to instruct us we should be using the designation Negro. Now mind you that was then. And references for groups have continued from there, across all differences. I even had a recent “correction” in the last 5 years, when speaking to a heterogenous group of employees, and used the term “you people”. Fortunately, people were comfortable enough to tell me later, or yell at me later…DON’T EVER……!!!! I still don’t get it–and hope someone here can enlighten me.
The point being…”retard” isn’t being thrown around as usage for the correct meaning. Retard is slow, halting, or delayed. Not wrong, idiotic, and stupid as you and some of your supporters suggest. So my first argument is for the insensitivity of the word, and the second is the wrong meaning for the intended usage.
Do what you want, and I know you will. But for those of you, who credit or rather discredit Howard Stern for resurrecting the word, just remember, it was the Kennedy family who really worked so hard to relegate this word back to it’s intended meaning…the mentally handicapped/challenged who we should all be looking out for whether in word or deed. Just a thought.
So no Rich you don’t answer to me. But for somebody having a conversation with you, you may have answered much.
PS My kids tonite at the dinner table when I brought this up…Hey do people go around saying: Why you diabetic? or You cancer person?
Does this mean we can’t call Rich a hemorrhoid?
Joanne, not sure about “you people.” I have heard people offended by it but it is usually followed by some kind of stereotype when it happens. Maybe some people are expecting one when someone starts a sentence that way?
I would also say that taking a verb (retard) or an adjective (retarded) and converting it to a noun to identify someone is probably part of it.
For example to say some one is a black person, while inaccurate chromatically is quite different from talking to someone and saying, “Hey John, you’re a black, let me ask you something…” Same would go for “a gay.”
Progressive Mom drives it home!
I agree. History shows that a group of people, based on one characteristic, were herded into groups, not allowed to marry, not allowed to travel, kept in confined,indoor spaces,without access to the out-of-doors. They were not allowed to vote, drive, travel or have free speech. They had limited access to education, if at all; they had limited access to medical care, since it was assumed that they would die at an early age regardless of medical intervention. They were often physically mistreated in the facilities into which they were herded … and Heraldo Rivera made his career on the back of this mistreatment. Their families, when interested, were told it was “best” if they were forgotten and families often pretended they were dead.
I was reading the comments in order (not good when at work) and was thinking this very same thing, the history of the treatment and the typecasting. It’s all too damned convenient to forget, overlook, disregard, or even dispute these facts when none of it has touched you. It makes all the much easier, too, when degradation is completely acceptable.
My humble thanks to RSmitty and Joanne.
Joanne, one of my favorite kitchen-towel-sayings is: Life is too short to cook for you people!
Maybe in honor of Mrs. Shriver, Rich can give the word up. There are so many other words to describe the birthers, Glen Beck, Sean Hannity, etc. Retard just dehumanizes a group of people who deserve better.
Common Rich, give it a try.
Why is it so difficult for people to give those who are different from them some human respect?
We are Christian Nation…that’s why…