Kay Bailey Hutchison: Rick Perry Gay?
Oh those wacky Rethugs. Talking Points Memo, by way of the Austin American-Statesman (if Texas secedes, can we please keep Austin?), reports that the campaign of Sen. Kay Bailey Hutchison, who is primarying incumbent Texas Gov. Rick “Secession Now” Perry, “included hidden phrases including “rick perry gay” in order to draw hits to its website.
In a candidate for Best Dissembling Statement of the Year:
“We did not know these offensive word associations were being searched for by hundreds of thousands of Texans everyday nor do we condone the computer-generated existence on our Web site,” Hutchison spokesman Jeff Sadosky told the Austin American-Statesman.
Oh. Then there must be an alternate explanation for why the ‘offensive word associations’ were on the site in the first place. Please allow ‘bulo to assist spokesman Sadosky:
“The seven monkeys hired for the express purpose of transcribing ‘Hamlet’ from the Olde English overstepped their bounds and have been terminated. It is my understanding that they have found gainful employment at a Texas free-market think-tank.”
Now, that wasn’t so hard, was it?
Comment by realdeal on 30 July 2009 at 7:45 pm:
What was offensive? Nothing here.
Comment by El Somnambulo on 30 July 2009 at 7:48 pm:
Hutchison’s words, not ‘bulo’s. Please comment more, realdeal. Your perceptive insights have been sorely lacking here.
Comment by jason330 on 30 July 2009 at 8:03 pm:
Wha..? Hamlet’s English is no different than ours, save a few archaic words and a slightly more poetic phrasing.
BTW – Fuck Texas.
Comment by El Somnambulo on 30 July 2009 at 8:12 pm:
Jason-It’s because these were PARTISAN monkeys who they wanted to keep on the payroll. But having no choice but to make monkeys out of them, the powers-that-be had to exile them to a ‘non-partisan good government think-tank’. Beats workin’ for a living. Although perhaps not throwing feces…
Comment by Art Downs on 30 July 2009 at 10:47 pm:
Shakespeare wrote in Modern English. For an example of Middle English, read the Canterbury Tales. Most folks need to look at the glossary every couple of lines and the tale is delightfully raunchy. Old English is more akin to German than the language we use today.
It is a common error to think of the words of The Bard as Old English but there are more than a few more cunning linguists haunting the ‘net.
Comment by Fascinated on 31 July 2009 at 1:29 am:
Jeff Sadosky sounds sexy.
Comment by Unstable Isotope on 31 July 2009 at 6:55 am:
Shorter KBH: It’s not our fault that people think Rick Perry is gay.
Comment by MJ on 31 July 2009 at 7:09 am:
The gay rumor has been flying around Texas for quite a long time, like a tumbleweed coming from Odessa and heading to Beaumont. In any case, we don’t want him on our team.
Comment by jason330 on 31 July 2009 at 7:56 am:
If Rick Perry is not gay, what is his hand doing on my leg?
BTW – Fuck Texas.
Comment by A. price on 31 July 2009 at 7:59 am:
do you think members of the gay community would WANT rick perry? girlfriend PLEASE
Comment by redlion on 31 July 2009 at 12:29 pm:
speak for yourself, gurlfriend. you do not run the gay world, as much as you might like to think so. you militant queers with your quota and prejudices give us all a bad name. who the eff cares. speak for yourself next time. jerk.