I am so confused. Without Jerry Falwell around, how will I know the real reason that Myanmar and China have both been hit with natural disasters this week. It can’t just be random, can it? I need someone to explain.
What Will We Do Without Falwell?
May 13th, 2008 by liberalgeek · 9 Comments
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9 responses so far ↓
1 Pandora // May 13, 2008 at 8:39 am
Don’t forget the tornados in the heartland.
I could go all science gal on ya and cite Global Warming…
Besides, I’m sure Falwell’s followers are out there repeating his words and calling him a prophet. I’m also betting that Hagee will step into those shoes at any moment.
2 Al Mascitti // May 13, 2008 at 8:49 am
I haven’t been keeping exact count, but ever since Pat Robertson announced that hurricane hit New York because God wanted it to, I’ve noticed that about 90% of this country’s national disasters hit red states. I can only assume that God hates the red-state a-holes who claim to love him most, yet never quote a single word Jesus is said to have uttered.
3 anon // May 13, 2008 at 8:52 am
The cynic in me says the televangelists would rather solicit relief donations to expand their organizations and maybe stick to their fingers a little bit. Claimig the victims were punished by God’s wrath would hurt receipts.
Tornadoes in Kansas on the other hand are clearly a punishment for voting Democratic.
4 Duffy // May 13, 2008 at 8:54 am
The Flying Spaghetti Monster was displeased with them.
5 Mike Mahaffie // May 13, 2008 at 9:02 am
That explains the meatball-sized hail.
6 Von Cracker // May 13, 2008 at 9:25 am
I bet he’s doing what he always wanted to:
Swordfighing with Freddie Mercury.
7 truth teller // May 13, 2008 at 9:48 am
When oh When are those folks ever going to learn that God Hates Trailer Parks!!
8 cassandra m // May 13, 2008 at 10:09 am
Has anybody checked in with Hagee? He’s been quick to tell everyone who will listen that Katrina was God’s punishment to New Orleans for planning a Gay Pride March the following week.
Nevermind that the French Quarter — ground zero for most NO decadence — was pretty much fine.
9 RSmitty // May 13, 2008 at 10:19 am
Al already touched on him. All you need to do is locate Pat Robertson. Not only will you get the reasons why it happened, you will also get his self-congratulatory, “Just as I predicted it,” or, “Told you so, nahnee nahnee boo boo!”
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